Just in case you misunderstood my last column and the argument over the Warwick Warrior designation, I can best sum it up with the word "balderdash". Native Americans have less claim to the word warrior than the student body at Warwick High School.

The only mistake we made was to ascribe all of the positive ideals to their past (something that was done with respect and a desire to honor them). So lets undo the mistake while holding on to the name.

A more accurate motif for a school named after a political sub-division in England would be Celtic. It is the area in which the word itself was born and ties in well with our community. Sports supporters could cover their bodies with Celtic designs and our personification (not mascot) could be Mel Gibson reprising his role in "Braveheart. All of our teams-not just the field hockey team-could wear kilts and they could paint their faces in the school colors.

We could build on the Druid image of a warrior. Team uniforms could be purchased from military surplus stores to represent the Druid worship of trees. But actually that wouldn't work because the Warwick Ministerium would probably not approve, and besides, the Druids lost to the Celts.

Another option would be the image of a Zulu warrior carrying a knobkerrie and wearing a loincloth. The biggest problem with that approach would be finding the animal skins to craft the loincloths from. And, of course, if the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals were to hear about it they would return to Lititz and protest outside of the school. Woodstream would probably not be happy because that may remind PETA of happier days when the late Cleveland Amory led them in protest of the Victor animal trap.

The school could also adopt uniforms-a current trend in education. Having been a Sergeant of Marines who married a Woman Marine and whose daughter is now a Marine (who just earned her good conduct medal) I see no reason that the school uniform could not be patterned after Marine Dress Blues. Such a decision would make Wally Hofferth the school commandant, all of the board members and administrators would be generals and teachers would be commissioned officers. Juniors and seniors would be non-commissioned officers (the class president would be the sergeant major) and everyone else would be privates. This conjures up a tornado of ideas in my warped cranium but it is another option for a warrior.

OK, how about a seal as a mascot. It could represent a Navy SEAL-another well-recognized holder of the warrior title? Or the school mascot could be a student just on the verge of passing who has just taken his final exams-he could be the Warwick Worrier.

So many puns, so little space.

But the facts remain the same. The name Warwick Warriors was and still is a good choice. It reminds us of so many superlatives-strength, honor, tenacity, skill, intelligence and protection-to name just a few. So leave the name alone and if the Native Americans are upset with the honor we have ascribed to them, just pick another of the warriors to represent us.

At Lititz Elementary School I learned this ditty: "Sticks and stones can break my bones but names will never hurt me." Why does it seem so many individuals and groups have forgotten that little truth and work so hard to make everything a personal affront? Once again, lighten up.